Called into ministry…Posted: January 29, 2008
Well, it has finally hit me. We are going into full time ministry…and I am terrified!
I thought it might be good to share and maybe remind myself how we or more specifically I got here…
I came to know God the week before I went into high school. (I am posting more about that in the “about” section). I know it may sound strange but I felt a sense of God’s calling even from that first day. I struggled with the fact that I thought God might be calling me into ministry for a while. I knew as a woman He was not calling me to be a “pastor” and I didn’t want to be a youth pastor or anything like that…children’s pastor? I did love kids but I don’t know it just didn’t fit. I kind of pushed it around in my mind for a while and didn’t think about it much until one night at church. They were speaking on something…I don’t remember…all I remember is God working on my heart and solidifying His call that He had set me apart for ministry. I didn’t know what else to do but surrender to it. So I did. I even walked down to the front of the church like a good little Baptist and “made a statement of faith”. I guess God was calling a lot of others in my youth group because Steve, (Whipple) who was also my youth minister, offered a class about being called into the ministry. I went. It was good. I still didn’t know what kind of ministry I was called into. I don’t exactly remember how or when but I began to realize that God was calling me to be a minister’s wife. I began to see that this is just as much of a calling as any other.
I meet Mark shortly after. It was good to hear he was called into the ministry at the age of thirteen, because I guess it would be pointless to have a relationship if we weren’t headed in the same direction with our life : )
My dad always tells me that Mark and I need to relax(…which is funny coming from him…if you know him : ). We have always been planners and never really messed around with dating. We some how knew our relationship was headed toward marriage from day one… which is scary if you knew how young I was : ) That is just who were are though. We had life planned out. We would get married after I graduated college and then Mark would finish up seminary and then we would some how get into ministry…..
Well things haven’t exactly worked out like that….and I am glad that God has greater plans than we do. If we had followed our plan we would never have been apart of CATR, where we have grown and learned more than I imagined. I would have never started my dance program Spotlight, where God has stretched, challenged and strengthened me.Starting that program has shaped who I am today. We would not have gotten married when we did. And if there is anything I am certain on, it is the timing in which we got married. I know it was of the Lord.
We have not followed the plan we thought was preplanned for us when we decided to go into ministry years ago. We have surrendered each step of our life to the Lord. We have not done a lot of things right but we have given what we had to Him. I am confident that although our path to ministry was not the traditional route, it was God’s route for us.
Mark and I heard a message recently about how those who are called into ministry are set apart in their mother’s womb. Wow! Hearing this helped me understand why we have been restless for so long to do what God called us to do. It is who we are. It is our passion to serve the church in full time ministry. Mark and I are very different people….very different… but if we share one thing it is our love for the church. We have a passion to love, serve, train, teach and ignite community in the Body!
It is honestly therapy for me to write this and just remind myself of these things as I write them. I am so scared. Moving, money and housing are enough to worry about (oh and a new baby!), however, my fear is much deeper. I am aware of a woman’s strong influence in her family. I have no idea what it means to be a minister’s wife?! I want to encourage and strengthen Mark. I don’t want to just watch Mark do ministry. I want to be with him and serve along side him. But where is the balance? Where do I step up and where do I sit back? I am so unequipped and so not the best person for this job but never the less God choose me for it….He choose us.
” Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born, I consecrated you;…Do not say for ‘I am only a youth,’ Because everywhere I send you, you shall go and all that I command you, you shall speak…. but they will not overcome you, for I am with you to deliver you.” Jeremiah 1